First
by acidicwolf
Summary: Matthew Williams was a quiet teenager facing a not so ordinary life. Ever since his childhood friend, Gilbert moved back to Germany and his brother away in the English land, he had been lonely for most of the times. With family problems, life isn't that great. Until one day. . . "I felt that senses were leaving me. The sentence — the dread sentence of death..."
1. Chapter 1

Author's Note : Hey everybody ! This is my first Hetalia fanfiction ! Please! I beg your pardon if my English is terrible as I am not from a country where English is our main language !

Disclaimer : I do not own Hetalia characters inside this story. All Hetalia characters fully belong to some Japanese dude.

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><p><em>'I was sick… I felt that senses were leaving me. The sentence —- the dread sentence of death… - Edgar Allan Poe'<em>

Matthew re-read the sentence calmly in his head which he basically just scribbled onto the surface of his table. Looking up, there stood Miss Teeger fuming on how her eighteenth ex-boyfriend disliked the way how her fried eggs are unsalted. And because of that she mercifully ended her relationship with the guy. Matthew and the rest didn't mind Miss T's rambles, because firstly, history wasn't their cup of tea. Secondly minutes were passing by like seconds when she starts to talk and due to the fact, the school bell rang.

Students gave their thanks to the teacher and made their way out of the classroom except for Matthew. He didn't like the hallway being all crowded and packed with people he'd never got used to. After a quarter of an hour sitting in his seat, assuring it was an 'ok' to begin putting his things away in his school bag, so he did.

"You know. You're the only one that seems to not be in a rush when school's over, Williams" the brunette mid-thirties lady said walking towards Matthew's desk. "And it feels like a compliment to me as a teacher knowing that _some_ care for school" continuing.

Matthew's body jolted slightly by the sudden appearance of the teacher but thankfully wasn't caught by her gaze. "Oh… I'll take that as a compliment too Miss Teeger" words came out of his mouth like semi-whisper tone but was loud enough for the teacher to hear.

She nodded approvingly. "You should really reconsider on dating, Williams! It's a pain in the a- excuse me. Pain in the back, but it's really worth it. Of course, not this time. Not for me" her expression revealing disappointment mixed with anger but any trace of it vanished when she looked back at the blond male. "What's your favourite type of girl?"

This was the … I don't know-th time she asked me to go on a date! But Matthew wasn't interested on this whole romance thing. He just… Didn't like giving his feelings to someone and expects the person the give theirs back to him. Exchanging feelings to keep it short. Letting out a sigh and adjusting his slipping glasses, he began to speak "I'm not interested in going steady or any of this romantic stuff Miss Teeger. It's just…" He thought of a suitable word to finish his sentence but gave up by simply shrugging.

"Don't say no, Williams! That's what I used to say when I was just a little girl." giving a double pat on Matthew's right shoulder. "Or you'll end up like me. Hopeless with dates and romance!" Letting out a laugh and walked back towards her desk. "Well, I'll see you next week! TGIF. Isn't it? That's what kids nowadays say. Argh I'm getting old ! Bye!" grabbing her bag, waving goodbye towards the standing Matthew and walked out of the classroom leaving him alone in it

Matthew couldn't do anything but smile at the teacher's statement. His brain knocking itself reminding that the day was getting late, Matthew hurriedly packed his things and left the classroom empty of people and walk towards his locker. You could say walking towards your locker in an empty hallway would be eerie . Well it is, as the silent was too much of an uncomforted. But Matthew didn't mind silence. He had always thought that silence was lonely and needed someone to be with. He couldn't help but to feel pity towards it. Twisting the combination locks and he opened his locker with ease. Matthew put and grabbed back some of his school materials and walked out of the building.

The sky was covered with black clouds warning everyone including Matthew it's going to rain sooner or later. Thunders were heard almost every 5 minutes and Matthew facepalm-ed himself because he forgot to bring his umbrella with him. Walking back home isn't usually like this… He wouldn't be walking alone… He had a self-proclaiming hero older brother named Alfred F. Jones. But about a year and a half ago Alfred was offered to a University in England to continue his studies and he willingly accepted the offer. Leaving Matthew and his family back in Canada.

"Alfred… I wonder how you're doing…" Soliloquising and eyes never leaving the pavement.

—

"Yo Mattie~ Wanna go to Bayshore later on with me?" Alfred pushed his little brother by the back, surprising him. "I'm thinking of grabbing a few pair of jeans and shoes and and oh! And McDonalds that would be good too! Come on Matt! You coming?"

Matthew knew he didn't have much of a choice even if he refused the offer as Alfred always finds his way to make him come. Puffing, Matthew stopped and faced his older brother , the other did the same. "But Alfred! This is the fourth time this week and you know Papa will not be pleased by this"

"Oh come on Mattie. You can always do that puppy eyes with dad . I know he can't resist your cuteness and adorableness" Alfred simply said. Noticing the other is blushing from his compliment

Matthew crossed his arm, annoyed and trying his best to put on his angry face "But you've been going out so much lately. Have you even done your school work?" scolding his older brother

"Yes yes yes! I've done it now lets go back home and ask dad before the dark arrives" Alfred grabbed Matthew's hand and walk as fast as they could back home.

—

Matthew smiled back at the scene in his mind. Where his brother would always be there to annoy him as much as he could during his walk back home and pretty much anytime. But deep inside Matthew knows that he, Alfred is a good brother and will always love him. He still haven't got used to being lonely … He still haven't got used to know the fact that Alfred is not with him at the current moment. Lips forming a frown from the facts.

Matthew blinked in surprised when he felt his head wet and looked up the sky. A drop of rainwater feel on his cheek and another and another and this continued on.

"Why was I so stupid?!" Matthew furious with himself and started running towards his house.

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><p><span>Author's Note<span> : I don't know how Canadian/American school system works. Someone please volunteer yourself so I won't be a laughing stock in the future ! :( Reviews are appreciated !


	2. Chapter 2

Author's Note : Hey guys ! I just couldn't hold myself from writing this chapter. I wrote this chapter until my iPad ran out of power and managed to continue it after I charged it halfway full. And plus I deeply apologise if my English isn't that good and kinda basic! I'll try to be a bit more creative in the future and I hope you guys will enjoy this chapter.

Warning : Contain strong languages and minor violence. May or may not be suitable for those at young age but who cares. Just read it

Disclaimer : None of the Hetalia characters are mine. All of them belongs to their respective owner.

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><p>Upon reaching the foyer of the house. Matthew's heart started to beat faster than usual and fear kicked in. A struck of lightning could be seen not far from where he is standing, sending a loud thunder through the air. Taking a deep breath, he walked towards the door and grabbed the knob. Exhaling and inhaling again, twisting the knob and pushed the door open.<p>

"Hh-hello mo-m-mother…" He greeted his mother with obvious fear upon seeing his mother's sour and angry face . Closing the door behind him to avoid eye contact._What is is now?….._ He could hear his mother mumbled something under her breath "I'm sorry mother… I didn't catch that" facing her again.

"I. Said." she paused and released her breath like a bull. "Don't. CALL ME YOUR MOTHER!" She shouted and angrily walked towards the horrified male . Every step she took caused Matthew's reflex to make his legs walk backward, though it was pointless when his back came in contact with the wall. "HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU PIECE OF SHIT?" Furiously grabbing Matthew's long hair "DONT. CALL. ME. YOUR. MOTHER!" banging Matthew's head onto the wall after every word. "DO YOU UNDERSTAND? HM?!"

"Yes mo-" her dark-brown eyes widened cutting Matthew's breath and threatening him to finish the sentence "Yes. Mrs. Quebec"

"Good boy…" She gently pat Matthew's left cheek with her free hand and tugged down his hair releasing it in the process. "Oi stupid shit. Don't forget dinner. Or…" she twiddled her fingers "you want me to do IT again" and walked away.

Matthew removed his glasses and wiped the flowing tears.

Everything would be much better if Alfred and papa were here. No fights. No violence. And the most important thing, protection . Mrs. Quebec isn't Alfred's and my biological mother. But in fact it was our biological mother's older sister. Mrs. Quebec was a moderate looking brunette unlike their biological mother who had blonde hair and ocean-blue eyes. And spent most of her entire life single until one day… After mama died giving birth to Matthew… That's where Mrs. Quebec stepped in and did things to seduce papa into marrying her. Why did she marry papa ? She told me that it was simply to take revenge on me for _KILLING_ her sister and to get into Papa's money.

Papa has a good job. A good job means that Papa was paid big. And a big paid job also meant that he will always be out on business trips, and his office. Rarely stepping into the house . And because of that too, I didn't have the chance to tell papa about Mrs. Quebec abusive actions and real intentions of marrying papa.

Of course I got to tell Alfred about this, without doubts he believed me and that just sets all my anxiety away but….. Mrs. Quebec always knew the way to turn a one hundred and eighty degrees position to an another one hundred and eighty degrees by her strong and artistic deception leading Alfred to disagree with Matthew. I got to tell Papa once. Just once… And never again. Papa disbelieved on her intentions and abusive actions towards me. Without Matthew's acknowledgement , their conversation was being eavesdropped by the no other Mrs. Quebec. Sparking her anger and lead to … To..

Matthew's memory was disrupted when Mrs. Quebec shouted from the kitchen and he quickly got onto his feet , nearly tripping on the stairs and made his way to the kitchen. _Not again…_

"Oh great you're here" she blew cigar smoke towards Matthew's direction. "Come here" she gestured with her pointer finger. And Matthew obeyed with fear. "Say Matthew… What's wrong with this dish?" pushing the plate of rum steak away in a proper manner. But Matthew knew that Mrs. Quebec is prone to burst into her usual rage.

"I-I-I… I dddd-don't know Mrs. Quebec" Words came out like whispers. Matthew didn't dare to look at the calm expression of Mrs. Quebec's again.

"Speak up piece of shit. I can't hear you" she demanded

"I don't know" this time he spoke a bit louder. Just enough for her to catch it

She nodded her head, still with the calm face of hers. "Come a little closer and I'll tell you" and he once again obeyed by her words. "Good. You want to know why?" Matthew wasn't sure if he should answer that so he just stared at her with dreadful expressions. "THE PROBLEM IS. IT ISN'T FULLY COOK YOU SHIT" spitting the meat on Matthew's face. "WHEN I SAY I WANT IT FULLY COOK. I WANTED IT LIKE THIS!" Taking Matthew's hand by surprise and she pressed the end of the lit cigar on his bare palm. Matthew wanted to scream but all he could do was shriek and endure the burning pain . Every second felt like an hour. All he wanted was for the pain to end. Finally, she pulled the cigarette from his palm. "Let that be a lesson to you. Fucking shit. Can't even cook properly" giving one last spit at Matthew's face and went out of the kitchen.

_It hurts… It hurts so much…_ Wrapping his burnt hand's wrist with the free one, trying his best to hold the pain. _Alfred… Papa…_ With shaky legs, he weakly walk to the sink and let the water flow down onto the palm. Cooling it and sending pain immediately upon contact. His breathing began to stutter along with the flow of tears.

"Hold it in, Matthew… You're stronger than that"

"Third degree burn. Interesting. How did this even happen, Williams-san?" Doctor Kiku examining the wound thoroughly.

"Urm….." Matthew tried to think of an excuse

"Well. Whatever it is, you should be extra careful next time , Williams-san" giving Matthew the treatment for the burn

"Yes… I will and thank you doctor" eyes not leaving his treated palm.

_And that's pretty much how my daily life is._

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><p><span>Author's Note<span> : Please don't forget to leave your reviews ! Even the negative ones ! Thanks for reading!


	3. Chapter 3

Author's Note : School's starting in 3 days and I am very and so excited for it! Do you guys love school? I love school (excluding the assholes in it). I'll get into some PruCan in future chapters ! I'm updating as fast as I can , because I need to focus on my studies real hard this year ! As always, reviews are appreciated even the negative ones !

Warning : I don't know what I should be warning to you guys...

Disclaimer : I do not own any of the Hetalia characters inside this story . All aph characters belongs to Hidekaz Himarayu.

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><p>"Papa!" He hugged his father with full affections. It was a rare occasion for Matthew that he didn't want to miss a second of it. Earlier, he had just got his wounds treated , bandaged at a clinic nearby and planned on to kill some time at the library by studying his favourite subject, Chemistry. The plan was canceled of course when Papa texted he'd just landed from Zurich and will be arriving home soon.<p>

"Matthew~ How's my little boy?" The elderly played with his son's hair.

Matthew was about to speak when Mrs. Quebec, who's standing behind Matthew's father, gave the 'I'm watching you' gesture with her pointer and middle finger. When Papa's around, Matthew felt safer and her threats doesn't seem to be scaring him. But that doesn't mean that she'll back off once Papa's gone "I'm doing fine Papa. And how about you?" Hiding his injured palm behind his back after breaking the hug.

His father just shrugged "Probably a bit jet lagged"stretching his arms "though.. I still need to finish some work" sighing after finishing his words.

_Work_. That word made Matthew's lip curved upward "But Papa… You're rarely home! can't you spend a little time wit-" his words were cut when his dad's pointing finger touched his lips. Grimacing Matthew.

"Please Matthew. You know how tiring Papa's work don't you? Maybe some other time. Okay?" Giving an another play with the son's hair but stopped when he sees something out of the ordinary. "Matthew! That curl of yours is getting out of hand!" tugging the sticking curl on the son's head

"But Papa-" once again Matthew was cut off when he heard Mrs. Quebec clearing her throat. Mrs. Quebec was just trying to be on Papa's good side by protecting him. Matthew made a negative thought, though its probably true. All signs of Papa's interest on ripping the curl off had depleted .

"Oh I'm sorry but my honey bunny is a bit jealous of me and Matthew" he moved to the brunette lady and grabbed her by the waist.

_Honey bunny?!_ Matthew face waving off the word 'disgusted' and he quickly took off to his room to avoid seeing any further scene. Deep inside he was mad because he didn't get to spend quality time with his Papa. _WHY DOES SHE HAVE TO TAKE EVERYTHING AWAY FROM ME?!_ throwing himself on the bed. _I'm calling Alfred_ , fishing for his phone after the thought.

.

"Hi this is the hero Alfred F. Jones speaking . If you're hearing this then-" Matthew rolled his eyes and pressed the red 'end call' button after the voice message started to play. _Figures_. Staring his phone. With nothing to do, Matthew is just left with boredom. And the only company he has right now is his stuffed bear, Kumajiro. It's embarrassing to admit that he still has the bear. He used to play this with his… Memories of 'him' flashing back. _I wonder if he still remembers me…_ Hugging the bear and closed his eyes.

—

"BUT HE'S MINEEEEEE!" Pulling the arms of the helpless stuffed bear

"NO! I WANT IT" the other pulled the legs. Both not giving up in the tug of war . After a few moments of struggling the door opened.

"Gilbert Beilschmidt! Let go of the bear this instance!" The woman said in a thick german accent, walking to the two.

"Aber mutti…." Letting go of the bear and ran to his mother. Matthew was glad to have his stuffed bear back and protected him by hugging to it tightly. The son and mother were talking in a language Matthew couldn't understand a single word. After they've done talking , the woman walked towards Matthew.

"Now Matthew…" kneeling "There is a thing called 'sharing' . Do you know that?" She asked in a mother-like tone. Matthew nodded. "Good. And you won't mind to share Kumajiro with Gilbert don't you?" Matthew hesitated for a bit, but shook his head assuming that was the answer she needed. "and Gilbert. You can't just take people's stuff without their permission"

"Yes mutti…" His head lowered , one leg drawing a circle on the floor.

"Now apologise to Matthew…" she demanded nicely

"I'm…" The violet-reddish eyes moved to the woman. The woman's eyes pointed to the blonde, telling him that the sorry belonged to Matthew. "I'm sorry" raising his hand for a handshake.

—

Matthew's eyes opened slowly when the sun's beam interrupted his sleep. Rising slowly, the uninjured palm acting as a support

"Gilbert"

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><p><span>Translations<span> : Mutti - Mother | Aber - But

Author's note : Please don't forget to leave reviews ! You guys are cute and adorable. I love you


	4. Chapter 4

Author's Note : I apologise for the short chapter everyone ! I'll give you longer chapters in future updates. The month of January is a very hectic month for me, so updates may be a bit slower than usual. Plus! Two awesome people left reviews ! You know how glad I am to read your reviews? My self-esteem was dropping when I see people with good English writing and I was jet lagging prior to just landed from a flight . But when I checked my email , there were two reviews. To see and read the reviews. Self-esteem? Went back to normal level. Jet lag? Whoosh! It was gone. :') Just to let you know I appreciate all of you and thanking you for the reviews! Thank you! (Maybe I'll give you longer chapters if you leave more reviews. buehehehehe)

Warning : Minor cursing. But who cares?

Disclaimer : I DO NOT OWN HETALIA. OKAY?

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><p>Eyes never leaving the printed words on the paper , staring each and one of the words like criminals. But all of it ended when his smartphone suddenly vibrated, alarming that it received a text message . Sliding the screen to unlock and tapping the messages icon gently.<p>

'**_Come to the study room when ur free_**'

It was from Papa. That's odd. Why would he ever want me to pay a visit to the room? Without further doubts Matthew got up from his desk seat and ambled to the room. Halfway of the journey, the study room door opened violently, Mrs. Quebec storming out of it angrily promptly after that. Secretly, Matthew liked seeing her suffer. Muahahahaha! Excuse my inner demon. You didn't have to see that… Though what's gotten into her?

"What are you smiling at?! You better wipe that off or I'll make you!" She threatened lowly

Amusing's amusing, but Matthew do fear her. Leaving her in the corridor by running to the study room. Knocking on the opened door. "Yes, Papa?"

The elder looked up from his messy desk . "Ah yes Matthew. Sit down"

—

"Wha- what?!" Eyes widened with disbelieved

"You really want to me to repeat the sentence again do you, Matthew?" Smirking

"Not really…" Looking down

"Great! It's a yes then! Go pack your clothes. We're leaving tomorrow morning" getting up from his seat and patted his youngest son on the shoulder

"But Papa…" The other raised his a single brow. "Why was mother … You know?" Pointing to the door with his eyes.

"Well because she loves you of course!" Matthew rolled his eyes in his mind. "She won't let you come with me. Because, I quote ; because travelling by planes is dangerous." Imitating how Mrs. Quebec talked. Internally, Matthew knew the reason Mrs. Quebec didn't allow him to follow his dad was because... She wanted to torture me more. Obviously.

Matthew couldn't contain his chuckle and went to door. "I'll be packing now. Have fun working, Papa!"

"Yeah. Soooo~ fun. Oh ! And don't forget to close the door"

Obeying to the instruction and went to his room. When he entered the room, the door closed by its own. Looking back, it wasn't really the wind or anything but the disaster mailer, Mrs. Quebec. _Fuck_ . "You're really lucky I'm not coming. Is that a relief to you?" Raising both of her eyebrows simultaneously

"Get out of my room or- "

"Or what? You can't do shit. You want to know why? Because you _ARE_ one!" Mocking

Its time he stood for himself. Gathering every bit of strength he has "Or I'll scream for Papa." Giving a brave and stern look to the woman in front of her.

She was taken aback by the bravery of the male. "This isn't over. You'll see" turning around and faced the door. "You'll see" giving a last warning before opening and slamming the door behind her.

Matthew exhaled , not realising he was holding his breath.

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><p><span>Author's Note<span> : Please leave reviews and tell me how you feel about this story. Don't forget to smile because you're cute and adorable!

This chapter was inspired by the song - Chained by The Coexist


	5. Chapter 5

Author's note : Argh! I tried getting this chapter 1K long but failed miserably :( Next chapter will be up today or early tomorrow ! You must know how busy I am today ! Like mein gott bring me the sleep.

Warning : Booooringggggggggg~

Disclaimer : I do not own any of the Hetalia characters .

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><p>Living in Canada sucks. Well… Sometimes. For example, you have to make stops when you're travelling because most airlines aren't making Ottawa and Toronto their secondary hub. So here is Matthew waiting at JFK airport, New York City. For once he's glad his papa makes large amount of money. Catching after a flight after landing and being stuck in a crowded terminal with jet lags? No thank you. He takes the time to pamper himself at Lufthansa's Business Class lounge.<p>

Matthew's favourite location at the lounge is, the rows of single couches where you can view the scenery of planes move from place to place. From runways to gates and from runways to the open sky . He and his (business associated) dad were waiting for their flight coded LH401 . New York City, USA to Frankfurt, Germany. It was kinda… A father and son trip. Since his Papa noticed that Matthew was sulking over how he's busy with work. So why not bring Matthew to come along?

Regardless, Matthew had to admit this. He thought following his papa to work might improve his relationship with the elder. You know? Father and son talk. The birds and the bees. Boy talk. Anything that might help to encourage a _covalent bond_ between them two. But no. Papa's still doing business things with the people in the lounge. Hand shake, some talking, business card exchanging and some more handshakes and more business junks.

Aside to that. Matthew is excited for Germany! Maybe he could meet his long lost friend, Gilbert. Though the chance might be one… Or two in a million. But there is hope to cling onto! It's a great journey ahead. What could touch up an already-awesome journey? Nice view to pleasure the eye, quenching cider? Those are nothing to bookworms. Matthew happily reached for his novel and starts to read it to fritter time away.

—-

"Are books really that fun?" Questioning the perusal blond.

"Yes it is!" violet eyes moving to the puzzled albino and showed the page where he was reading "You can learn lots of new things when you read" encouraging

"Hurm…? I personally think that books are boring. Seeing words make me yawn" leaning towards the book Matthew was holding in his hands earlier. "What's this book about?" tapping it with his pointer finger

"It's about a kid who lived with his cruel uncle and aunt, then later he received a letter from an Hogwarts. Oh Hogwarts is the name of p-" Matthew tried to explain but was cut off by the albino male

"Boooooooringggggg" Gilbert laid on the floor with his back, next to the sitting blond. Matthew looked at the albino angrily. "Hey you know want to know what's fun?" He got up to his feet. Matthew's face still clearly stating that he was offended. "This!" snatching the book from Matthew's hands and ran out of the room

"Gil! You give that back!" Chasing after the male

The albino laughed loudly "catch me if you can!"

"GIL IM GOING TO KILL YOU WHEN I GET YOU!" threatening whilst smiling

—-

Matthew smiled back at memory and continued his reading.

—-

Okay so. Let me just say. This hotel room or suite… Papa insisted on calling it suite. So, the suite is enormous! Probably bigger than his own room. The seven hour and a half hour journey was worth it. The first target after a long flight is of course the bed. Throwing himself on the bed. Argh. It feels like sleeping clouds. Not physically possible though…

"Now you've settled in your suite. I'll be in mine's okay?" The father rubbed his son's hair. From this point. Matthew didn't care. The bed's too comfortable to even say anything. So he just nodded with his eyes shut. "Okay then. Get plenty of rest" kissing Matthew's hair "I love you". Shortly after that Matthew could hear the room door closing and footsteps going fainter and fainter.

Wait a second. What does papa mean when he said 'he will be in his own suite'. Matthew got up from the bed and took off his glasses. _Damn it Papa. You said it's a father and son trip! What's the point of getting separate suites?_ Lips had already formed a frown. Although, it's not fair to only blame the other party. Lifting his injured palm. _How did papa not even notice about this?_ When he was at the security check in JFK . The security guard commanded him to open the gauze bandage to see if he's hiding any weapon. _Spot on Mr. Security guard!_ Whatever. I'm sleeping

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><p><span>Author's note<span> : To those who learn chemistry might know what's a covalent bond is! Though I'm not very sure you'll understand if I explain it here... As I am not good with explaining. But Google can help! Please ! Any of you that has been constantly to JFK ! Please tell me if I have any mistake. I haven't been to New York in 4 years ... And Frankfurt in almost 8 years. Lufthansa is a German airline by the way ! As always, please leave me some reviews! Remember that you're cute and adorable !


	6. Chapter 6

Author's note : hi hi hi! Did you miss me? I bet you didn't hahahahahahahahahahahaha. Okay I am so sorry for the delay! In the previous chapter, I said I'll be updating **on the same day or the tomorrow EARLY. **But look when is this chapter posted? 2 weeks after that. I felt guilty for not updating this. I have four reasons this chapter isn't posted as I promised. One being, I'm always catching a flight nowadays. Two, school obviously T-T Three, the views kinda dropped on the previous chapter... Which made me sulked a bit lol. And lastly four, I'm going to be honest because you people deserve it. I've be procrastinating ~ :p I hope you enjoy!

Warning : Alfred's stupidity.

Disclaimer : I do not own the Hetalia characters.

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><p>Desperate times call for desperate measures. (Puppy) eyes locking on the other, hands together and is brought to the chest . Maybe not that one...(Injured palm). Oh! And one most important step Alfred taught! Begging aka cute and ("gay" - Alfred) adorable begging. "But Papa! Pweaseeeeeeeeee"<p>

The elderly's corner lips twitched a bit. Not knowing whether to comply to Matthew's plead or not. In the end, he could only sigh. "No Matthew… You know how busy I am. Don't you? Maybe tomorrow? Non?"

Matthew shook his head "Non papa non" replying back in french

Sighing again, he took out his wallet and obtained two 500 euro notes from it , handing the notes to Matthew. "Here. Buy whatever you want with it. Finish it if you want" quickly taking off before the other could even protest that he didn't want any money. "Bye Matthew! Love you"

If it was physically possible, people could be seeing puffs escaping from Matthew's furious face. _Damn it Papa! I shouldn't have followed you to Frankfurt if this were to happen!_ Huffing, throwing the notes he'd just received to the surface of the carpet. _That didn't do much damage…_ sighing, he picked the money back up reluctantly.

—

Only taking fifteen minutes of (the taxi driver) driving from the hotel to one of the famous Skyscrapers in Frankfurt, Main Tower. Matthew, of course was bored on his bed back in the hotel. All he could do was stare at the two 500 euro notes, not knowing what to do with it. Until the idea of going sightseeing slipped out of his head. And that is how he's standing on the platform of the tower, one hundred and eighty plus meters above the ground.

"Alfred ! Guess where I am?" Unleashing his excitement to his older brother

"Come on Matt! I hate surprises. But if I were to guess… Hurm… Probably Dad's room. Remember the last time we were in it?"

"No! And not an another word about it!" clearing his throat "I'm on top of the Main Tower! The scenery is amazing. It's a pity you're missing it" sticking out his tongue as if Alfred is in front of him.

"No fucking way!"-pause-"where is that?"

Matthew tried to say something but no words came out. The stupidity of his brother is too strong in this conversation.

"Matt? You still there?" Alfred's voice a bit concerned

"Frankfurt… Alfred.. It is in Frankfurt… _Allemagne_…" Unnoticed that french slipped out of his mouth

"Oh…. Ahaha… Ha. Silly of me!" Silence was given in return "you see Matt.. I got to do my assignments and I need to pass it up to my lecturer today . Man he can be such an ass! So I'll call you later okay?"

_To hell with your later , Alfred. That later of yours never came!_ Least that's what Matthew wanted to respond back to him. "Okay. You study well there. Don't do anything stupid or I'll kill you!" a speck of sadness rose up

"Yes I wont. Okay ! The hero, Alfred is hanging up on you now. See ya!"

"See ya…" pulling away the phone away from his ear after the call ended. "I miss you, Alfred" giving his phone a smile.

—

Grüneburgpark. Matthew remembered the time where him and Gilbert were at the park... _No no no no_. Covering his flushed face with the brochure he got hold of from a random cafe. _Maybe I'll find him here... Just maybe._ Lowering the paper to see where he's walking. His violet eyes sparkled, owing the fact he's seeing a man and to Matthew's assumption, his girlfriend playing with a Hovawart.

If Matthew could recall, didn't Gilbert's younger brother have the same breed as the one he's seeing right now? What was his brother's name? Bringing himself to a thinking pose. _Lu.. Luddie? No not that... Ludwi- "_LUDWIG!" he cheeredd the name out loud, causing people around to look at him with a confused look. One of them even pointed towards himself with a 'are you calling me?' look.

"Guten tag!" running away with his flushed being covered by the brochure. _I shouldn't have come her- _"Ouch" his reflex made the word come out after bumping with someone "I'm sorry! I'm so sorry! Sorry! SORRY" lifting his head , to see the person he collided with.

"Ah. It is okay. I wasn't looking where i was walking" the person said with thick german accent

_That voice. It sounds familiar ... _In front of him was... Gasping "Mrs. Beilschmidt?"

"Hurm?" the older woman raised one of her eyebrow "Do I know you?"

"It's me! Mrs. Beilschmidt" not noticing the woman twitched by the title

The woman inspected the blond male up and moved her gaze downwards and up again. "I think I might've seen you somewhere before..."

Matthew nodded his head excitedly "Yes yes it's me! Matthew Williams! Your neighbor back in Canada

"Matthew... Willi- MATTHEW WILLIAMS?" Her eyes widening" It's a surprise to see you here! Mein gott look at how big you've grown" adjusting her slipping leather handbag "How long has it been since we last met? How's your father doing? You know what? Never mind, I hope you're free because I'm taking you to my house" grabbing hold of Matthew's arm and dragging him.

—

"I am sorry for the mess. I'm not really ready for guests" pushing everything on the coffee table into the trash bag, including the half empty glass of beer.

Matthew shook his head not really caring of the messiness of the apartment "No it's okay Mrs. Beilschmidt. I really don't mind"

Exhaling, she relaxed her bottom on the couch in front of Matthew "Please. Call me Erna" telling him to call her by her first name

Matthew wasn't used on calling someone older than him without the formalities. Except of course, Alfred who is his brother. But Matthew had known Mrs. Beilschmidt since he was young. The process of calling her by her first name is going to consume a bit of time for him to get used to it "Okay... Erna"

The woman smiled happily by the calling "I'm sorry to drag you here. Are you sure you dad doesn't mind you being here?"

"Yes I'm sure" nodding too. "Where are the others? I haven't seen anyone yet?" looking around the room to find anyone other than the woman in front of her

The smile on Erna's face vanished instantly upon hearing the question

_Is it me or is she looking like she's cryin- _"Mrs. Beilschmidt are you okay?" forgetting to call her by her first name

"yes yes.. I am okay" chuckling and wiping the tears with her lower palm "It's been almost 6 years and I still can't get over it"

"What do you mean by getting over it Mrs. Beilschmidt?" confused

"Erna" correcting him. Matthew nodded, understanding. "Me and Beilschmidt are... geschieden? Verdammt ! What's the word..." biting her the tip of her thumb's nail "Divorced?"

Matthew's eyes widened in disbelieved. "What? How- Why? I'm sorry for what happened Erna" feeling pity for her

"Nein. You shouldn't apologise for what had happened. It's not your fault anyway. I deserved it... Would it be okay for me to tell you what happened? No one... No one is here ... here for me to talk to"

All he could to to make her feel better was to lend his ear to hear her story, and offer her a hug. Matthew is sure that she hadn't gotten a hug in years. Apparently the cause of divorce was because of Erna herself. She had been doing two-time behind Mr. Beilschmidt's and she got caught sleeping together with her significant other. After the divorce, Mr. Beilschmidt took the two boys of his away from Erna. Having less information on where her sons are at, but she heard rumours that they moved to Austria. Until then, she had been working as a nurse at a local hospital, but due from the whole divorce event, she had been suffering from depression and is currently an alcoholic . Matthew wished he could help Erna more, but alas, there was nothing he could do.

Erna had insisted on driving Matthew back to the hotel as a thanks for listening. But Matthew had pushed the offer away kindly, not wanting to burden her, but she kept on insisting until Matthew had to accept it. The car ride was filled with conversations that sent him and Erna herself to be smiling again. Giving her one last hug before she drove back to where she needed to be. Matthew waved her goodbye and watched the car made it's way out from the hotel. Matthew looked at the torn paper in his hand which Erna's phone number was written on it.

_"If you have anything to talk me with, just give me a call. I hope that hand of yours heals soon" hugging the blond_

Matthew smiled by the kindness Erna had given him. Despite the change of her personality, the motherly act still hasn't worn off of her. Before returning to his suite, he went to his father's to see if he's still busy . But after unlocking the door with the room card his father lend to him, he only found disappointment. No one was in sight. Sighing, he closed to door and made his way to his room.

One day left till he has to say goodbye to the land of Germans. Picking the 'School of the Arts' where he had left it on the bed and began to read where he last stopped.

—

The only father and son thing they did throughout the journey was only having breakfast together. You may think that is a small thing but it is a big deal with Matthew. The last time he was on the same table with his father was when Alfred forced him to do the puppy eyes thing. It was nice for a change. Matthew boasted to his father that he scored his chemistry test with flying colours, how he went to grüneburgpark and met Erna which his father completely forgotten about her . The only thing that is bothering him is the amount of phone calls his father received during breakfast. Not giving him much time to talk more about his life to his father. Until ;

"What happened to your hand Matthew?" asking out of the blue. Matthew was sure that he hid his hand below the table, out from his father's sight. "I've been wanting to ask you since we left Ottawa but never got the chance to ask you"

All the blood from his body drained out from his body. _Should I tell Papa the truth? What if Mrs. Quebec found out I told Papa what if-_

"Matthew? Are you sick?"

His father's words made him snap out of his thoughts "No no no! I am all fine Papa! Nothing to worry about" chuckling to lighten up the situation

"Just let me see your hand" arm reaching out, asking Matthew to place his palm on top of his

Matthew's heart started to beat faster than usual "Can't we do this after breakfast Papa? Injuries tend loosen people's appetite" giving an awkward smile

His father raised one of his eyebrows , eyes pointing to his palm. Commanding Matthew to show his palm. Just when he was about to raise his palm. For once he was glad that his father phone rang , informing an incoming call. His father fished for his phone and answered the call with a swipe on the screen. Matthew let go of his breath, not knowing he had been holding it. "I need to be at Mr. Adalbrecht's office. I'll be back soon. After finishing your meal, pack your things. We're going straight to the airport after I'm back" getting up from his seat, his father walked out the hotel restaurant.

Matthew did what his father told him to do, and waited for his father by lying on the bed. Lifting his arm up to see his injured palm.

_"Let that be a lesson to you. Fucking shit"_

Mrs. Quebec's voice filled his mind. He closed his eyes, pushing the memory away as far as possible from him. _What did I do to deserve all these?..._

"Are you okay?"

"No... It hurts..."

"You should really be extra careful next time"

_"Matthew?"_

"Here let Papa heal that for you" lifting the small child with ease

_"Matthew. It's time to go" series of knocking could be heard_

"Thank you Papa..." resting his head on his dad's shoulders

"_Matthew?"_

That one loud knock made Matthew's eyes opened instantly. _What time is it...? _Taking off his glasses and rubbed his eyes. "Yes Papa I'm coming~" hopping off his bed, and quickly grabbed his bag and walked to the door, opening it. "Ready"

"Were you sleeping?"

"I guess so..." closing the door behind him

"Come let's go. And wipe that drool of yours"

Matthew rubbed the corner of his mouth with his sleeve , indeed there was drool. "Thank you..." face flushed in embarrassment. _I guess I missed Papa's fatherly act until it was brought into a dream. __How I missed those days, Papa._

—

"Aww I missed you, sweetheart" hugging Matthew's father. After both of them had arrived at the house. Mrs. Quebec was waiting outside of the gate. Not sure if she missed Papa or missing to torture Matthew. "And of course you too" she went and hugged Matthew, he didn't even return the hug back. He knew all those were fake. Those were just to be on Papa's good side. She let go of the hug almost in an instant, showing her discomfort of hugging Matthew. "Matthew can you bring all of the bags inside?"

"Oh no. I've got it covered. His palm is injured, so he can't do much work" lifting taking two of the bags from the boot of the taxi car. Mrs. Quebec's calm eyes turned into a murderous one when she looked at Matthew but quickly changed back to normal when the father of the blond turned to see both of them. Matthew swore if Mrs. Quebec tried acting, she would won twenty awards by just acting in one single movie.

"Oh no! Really? What had happened to you Matthew?" taking the palm of Matthew's. "Are you okay?"

"I'm sure he will be fine. Injured himself during hockey practise" his father explained Matthew's lies. Of course he had to lie... It isn't like the man would believe him anyway. Walking inside the house with the luggage.

Mrs. Quebec's eyes never leaving Matthew's father until he was completely inside the house. "You did a good job on lying back there. but..." pressing one of her thumb at the injured spot, causing Matthew to squint in pain. "Not good enough" finally letting go and throwing the hand away in disgust.

_That's it... It's time... I can't stop being a coward anymore_ "If you continue on doing this. Papa won't believe me anymore, and I WILL tell that it's all of your doings Mrs. Quebec" putting the bravest face Matthew have. That seemed to got her.

"You wouldn't dare!"

"If the situation asked for it. I dare!" locking on her eyes

Taking a step back from Matthew's words. _Huh, she's weak after all. You just have to stand up for yourself! _"You... You wait!" stomping away to the house.

* * *

><p><span>Author's Note<span> : I know... This chapter was kind of boring and so cliched but it took me 12 hours to write this. Don't you guys just have that moment where you have the idea but can't put it into words? Yeah that's why it took me a long time to write this chapter. Plus, I tried writing Erna's in a german accent but I failed. So yeah... WRITING ACCENTS IS JUST NOT FOR ME. I'm kind of not getting Mrs. Quebec being the character I wanted to because... I have a kind heart! Bhahaha. If you guys were wondering, the book Matthew was reading was School of the Arts by Mark Doty. Go check it out! And I will be getting into some PruCan soon! I swear ! Please don't hate me! I wanted to show how Matthew missed having a normal non-busy father. Which kinda reflects my current situation ;p lol

As always! Reviews are appreciated ! Proof? I got two new reviews and it made me really happy. I cried


	7. Chapter 7

Author's Note : Man did I say January is a hectic month for me? Boy how wrong I am :D Idk when will the next update will be.. But here's a sneak peek of it ;

"Gilbert?"

Warning : Urm... Minor curses? Idk

Disclaimer : I do not own Hetalia.

I hope you enjoy this !

* * *

><p><em>'So here I am writing this again. blurghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh why am I still writing this diary. Did I write diary ? Neh, I totally meant journal. Because diaries are for pussies. Bought a billion of note books for the old man and a coke for myself. Elizaveta is still a bitch, good thing she gave me a hug and all that weird shit people do when someone is leaving. Deeply, there is a small sadness in my heart because I have to say goodbye to all of them. Except that piano bastard. fuck him. But I am too awesome for ev-'<em>

A jagged line was accidentally scribbled by the end of the sentence. Massaging the spot on his head, where he had just now been hit by a newspaper. "THE FUCK. WHAT WAS THAT FOR?"

The tall, muscular blond crossed his arms with a face plastering '_you know what's that for'_

"Lighten up a bit would ya? Besides, we're not even leaving right now"

The other just sighed and shook his head before leaving the room.

Grabbing back the pencil from where he had left it and continued on writing. Drawing an arrow pointing to the jagged lines, he continued on writing.

'_That. That is the work of my totally UN-awesome little bruder. He too is still a bitch , but I like teasing him. Because it's funny when he's being in a sour mood. There is this one time I caught him crying because I left the kitchen in a mess. What a BABY' _

He proceed his writing after drawing a mini figure of his younger brother crying above the gigantic and capitalised 'CRY BABY'

'_Welp I should be packing, see you later un-awesome _d̶i̶a̶r̶y̶ _JOURNAL"_

—

_"_NERD" the emo wannabe pushed him until his back kissed the locker, making a loud bang. He then walked away with satisfaction.

Matthew blew some of his hairs that were blocking his eyesight and adjusted his glasses. What a great way to end school. _'JUST BECAUSE I DO WELL IN MY STUDIES DOESN'T MEAN I AM NERD' _his heart screaming as loud as it could, protesting by the surname given by probably 89.9999% of the students studying here.

"Want me to give him some kick in the butt?" Miss Teeger questioning after appearing out of nowhere

Matthew quietly cursed himself for being jumpy "No.. Idiots like them aren't worth it.." eyes judging the male who threw him to the locker

again with the shoulder patting, "That's my boyyyy~ Kick em' with your PhD" giving away her big grin to the student beside her

"Thanks Miss T... But I don't think I can achieve that..."

"What in the Canada are you talking about? I mean look at your grades. That shit- sorry. That thing is probably more than enough for you to get into Oxford"

Matthew crossed his arms "Okay now you're just teasing me Miss T"

"I am not!" slapping the upper arm of Matthew "besides it's true. You need to start giving credits to yourself. If no one is giving you , besides me of course . Then who will?"

_'Well that is true... Perhaps I do need to-' _His train of thoughts was cut off my Miss T. "But don't give yourself too much credit . Don't let the ego swallow you , or you'll be just like _them_" she pointed with her chin towards the group of students that were known for being.. well.. stupid and egoistic. "Do I make myself clear?"

Matthew nodded , swallowing the words given by his History teacher. "Thank you for the advice. I will try my best" a small smile sticking on his face

"I like it when you smile. You're just sooo mf-ing cute" pulling the side cheek of Matthew.

Okay that sets the limit between him and anyone. Matthew pushed Miss T's hand slowly yet with strong force. His face in disdain with a bit of smile after successfully removing the pair of fingers from his cheek. "Why is everybody calling me that? I am a man! And... yeah!"

"Someone's in a bit fussy mood. Okay here's the thing, you need some evening coffee. My treat, deal?" elbowing Matthew again.

Matthew brought himself to a thinking pose with a smirk on his face, thinking whether he should accept or reject the offer but to the fact he had accepted the offer already. "Deal"

"Great. You drive" throwing her car key to Matthew and walked towards the exit.

Matthew caught and glanced at the object on his palm, registering what she had just said"Wha.. What.. WHAT? Why me? What if I will break your car what if what if what if-"

Miss T just laughed. "Okay okay I was joking. Give it back when we reached the car"

Exhaling in relief, he followed Miss T to her car.

* * *

><p><span>Author's Note<span> : Okay so just to let you guys know. I'm picturing Miss Teeger as Jessie Buttafucco :P Because she is one cool and sassy gurl.

I have a question for you guys ! Please answer it ;

I will be going to Hong Kong this tuesday, and I was thinking if I should go. There are two factors that made me not want to go there, which is ;

i) There are some political issues going in Hong Kong which safety might not be what I'll get when I arrive there.

ii) Chinese New Year is approaching (Most of the shops/places will be closed)

I HOPE YOU GUYS ENJOY THIS BORING CHAPTER . SEE YA


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